Westminster Debate for KIDS (Kids in Divorce or Separation)

In commemoration of the 20th Anniversary of the Children Act 1989, Divorce Manual and Mishcon de Reya hosted a debate in the Houses of Parliament last night on the welfare of the child and the significance of that welfare in private family law.

At the heart of this debate was the notion that although the Children Act 1989 specifically insists that the welfare of the child be of paramount consideration in every family law case, the reality is such that this is just not happening. As a result the debate was a discussion of two parts: targeting the problems and from there, considering solutions.

Acting as Chair for the evening, Divorce Manual was privileged to sit among the panel members: Lord Justice Munby, Lord Justice Wall, Lord Listowel, Tim Loughton MP, Bob Reitemeier and Sandra Davis.

The audience, which was made up of politicians, senior academics, psychiatrists, therapists, heads of family organisations and government departments as well as interested individuals offered up some highly insightful questions which made for a lively and interesting debate. Lord Justice Munby expressed the view that the system was in need of financial support and that organisations offering mediation needed to be encouraged. Lord Justice Wall held similar views but went on to express his concern about intractable disputes and the stark realities that colour the system’s ability to resolve such conflict and how this conflict ultimately impacts upon children.

Lord Listowel reminded us that both the public and private sector are not mutually exclusive and went on to explain that many of the solutions offered that evening for the dilemmas faced in private family law could impact directly on public family law and to that end solutions needed to be carefully considered as other children going through other sectors may suffer.

Tim Loughton also expressed enthusiasm for making mediation more widely available and shared his concerns about the current system. Tim was particularly concerned about the need to support the concept of marriage and to try to help families to stay together as much as was reasonably possible. Bob Reitemeier spoke of the nature of parenting and the current culture in place in the West, which sometimes overlooks the autonomy of the child, which had long term implications not just on parenting skills but on how the family justice system copes with families struggling with unresolved conflicts and how children feel about their place in the family unit and themselves. Sandra Davis began the debate with a video clip of a little girl expressing her personal hurt and frustration at her parent’s struggle to cope with their divorce and she then went on to describe the traumatic effects of the current legal process on children and why the system needed to change.

It was fabulous to hear the panel share their extensive insight with the audience and once they had offered their perspectives on the various problems they observed from lack of funding, to the adversarial nature of court culture and beyond, discussing these thoughts with the audience, they moved on to considering solutions.

Although the panel members viewed the problems from different angles, it was clear that there was much common ground, not least of all once we began to look more closely at the possible solutions. Despite the echoed sentiment that lack of resources and intractable disputes were large obstacles to the smooth running of the family justice system, Tim was rather optimistic that changes for the better could take effect and make a difference.

Solutions offered ranged from more mediation, to compulsory conflict clinics and the need to recognise the autonomy of the child as a legal right. The audience welcomed these suggestions and elaborated upon them, sharing their wealth of experience with the panel and offering solutions of their own, such as retreats for conflicted parents and more support for children through the bolstering of social workers.

Despite the debate lasting for two hours, it was clear that we could have gone on; the desire to talk about issues surrounding children and to raise awareness is extraordinary and to that end, the debate was a timely and poignant event, not least of all because of the anniversary of the Children Act which the debate in part celebrated that evening.

Divorce Manual would like to thank Sandra Davis of Mishcon for the wonderful
opportunity to chair this debate and for sharing their perspective on a pressing problem that needs urgent attention. Special thanks must also go to Tim Loughton for allowing us to use the exquisite Grand Committee Room in Westminster and for kindly agreeing to sit on the panel that evening. My thanks also to the rest of the panel, who graciously gave up their Monday evening despite hectic schedules, to be with us and to share their superb wealth of knowledge and experience with us. A big thank you also to Westminster Events and Sound, without whom none of the gadgets and gizmos in the room would have worked and for their patience with me over the preceding months!